I’ve decided to call myself arKade, because I want to remain anonymous. Like just about everyone else on this planet I feel like I have something to say. And my dream is that someone will listen. I think there’s that little want in all of us.
So Ok apparently I think I’m interesting. So let me think. What’s interesting about me? Hmmm…
Well I’m just going to shoot of some stuff I do, and let’s see what comes out.
First I’m desperate for money. I want to be a millionaire. In fact for some reason I want £25 million so I can retire nice and fat for life. I also want that money soon. By 32 (I’m 29 and a half by the way). Probability is I won’t make it, but my heart say “you can do it faggot!”*
I’m doing OK. Not great but OK.
I left a high profile job in London because I fucking hated it. I literally jumped into the profession I’m in, and thanks purely to learning copywriting, direct marketing, and sales in two year I charge 4x** what most others do (I’m looking to make that 8x soon***). Income wise I’m doing good – but man I need to learn to manage it better.
Ok back to interesting. Hmmm… Come on think…
Ok I’ve been in a 7 year relationship with a girl I’m pretty sure I love to bits, and she is head over heels for me. She wants marriage and a baby – and soon – but a part of me is shit scared and wants to drop it all, travel the world – enjoying all it has to offer – particularly the women!
I find these things very hard to resist
Oh yeah despite loving my girlfriend/fiancé (that’s a completely different story), I regularly participate in what many call ‘Game’ or ‘Pick up’. Assuming you’ve had your head buried in the sand for the last decade, that’s basically when you try to learn the art of seducing women to the point they want to pull out your dick and stuff it in their mouth.
I haven’t slept with anyone through game yet – and I don’t know if I ever will. Part of me feels guilty for my girl (remember I’m 93% sure I love her), but part of me knows I need to be in the game. I consider it too important of a skillset.****
It’s not that I haven’t slept with many girls. I have. Just over 30 odd, and many pretty good quality. The problem is that I did it in university (college for you yanks), where I was a buffed up hunk of beefcake. Basically I barely had the ability to chat up women well, but I didn’t need to – I was big and reasonably ripped back in 2006-2008. This was before every 5th dickhead who comes round the corner went to the gym. It really meant something back then.
Oh yeah, after 2009 – around the time when I first met my girl I got fat. Fucking fat. I literally went from great shape to a tubby piece of shit in around 6 months. It was amazing in a way. And with it went my confidence.
You see I’ve always been loud and extroverted. That’s just me. But when I started working out it boosted my confidence through the roof. When I lost it I became self-conscious and couldn’t get out of my head. That was a real shitty time. I’m in good shape again, but I yo-yo quite a bit. I’ve never reached anywhere close to the figure I had, nor do I ever think I will, or overly care to.
I went through something like this – except reverse the before and after
Somewhere along the line I’ve also become spiritual to some degree. I meditate daily for weeks on end and think it’s one the greatest things a human can do. I then stop for a few weeks, sometimes months and become a grumpy, whiny bastard who hates himself. Literally meditation keeps me sane.
Ermmm… what else…
I have a bunch of cool friends, but for some reason I don’t have any two which know each other well. This is something that pisses me off like mad. I crave a better social circle. I often sit at night feeling down about it. For the last year I’ve been running a meetup group for entrepreneurs to try fix that. I’ve met a few cool guys, but for the majority it seems to attract the lamest excuse for entrepreneurs I’ve ever seen. I plan to do something about this – I just have no clue what just yet.
I’m obsessed with sex, but recently have been dealing with a non existence libido, yet remained obsessed with sex. And I’ve been having boner problems.
My Dick Is Often Sad
I also do improv comedy. Not that I give a shit about being a better comedian in any way, but I kept hearing it improves your social skills. In a weird way I love it. It works for sure.
That’s the other thing. I am obsessed with social dynamics – I practice being more charismatic, and I’ve got much better (some may even say pretty damn good). I also love sales psychology. I love studying influence and direct marketing too. And I love pickup. As far as I’m concerned this is all the same thing. What I like to term as ‘applied psychology’*****. Smart or what?
Fuck that’s enough for now. I could go on forever but that’s the point of this blog. I can save my life story for then.
*By the way I’m not homophobic. But I regularly use ‘gay’ and ‘faggot’. I’m neither anti-gay or pro-gay. I literally don’t give a fuck, and scratch my head why so many people do. But yeah, I grew up around where the words ‘gay’, ‘faggot’, ‘puff’, ‘fudgepacker’, and my personal favourite ‘battyboy’ were thrown around. That’s what we’d say. If anything phrases such as ‘fuck off you gay’, or ‘you’re such a faggot’ were terms of endearment.
**If there’s one term I hate it shit like 10x (pronounced “10 ex”). Don’t ask me why. It grinds on me.
***That’s now been done
**** For those interested I’m a daygamer.
***** I stole that from Dan Kennedy. But shhhh!
If You Liked This
Guys if you loved this you’ll love my free newsletter. It’s where I discuss more shit like this, including stuff I don’t like to put up on this site – it’s 100% free and you can subscribe by filling out the form below:
And if you enjoyed this please share this article on something – Facebook, twitter or some other social media crap. I’m a pure hobbyist and don’t get paid a penny for this. But your support means the world to me.
And ffs please comment on this blog. Do you have any idea how great it feels to see someone actually reply to something you wrote? Fucking AMAZING! I read every single one of them.